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Peninsula Kids
Home»Parenting Articles»How to deal with a social media obsessed teen
Parenting Articles

How to deal with a social media obsessed teen

Updated:July 14, 20214 Mins Read
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By Michelle Mitchell

It is rare that I meet a girl who doesn’t have a phone in her hand. She usually has at least one eye on her online status while she’s talking to me. Some may find this rude, but I personally don’t. I understand why. If teenagers aren’t online they don’t exist, so they stay connected 24/7. They don’t want to be invisible, just in case they miss out.

Our daughters have a love – hate relationship with their phones. They can’t live happily with them but they also can’t live without them. They admit to being addicted. In fact, the average teenage girl sends 4050 texts per month. That’s more than six texts per waking hour! It’s also why they need us (rather than want us) involved in their online world. Without us it’s highly possible they could lose their way.

Mums tell me that although their daughters may not be sending nude images or talking to paedophiles, they are constantly distracted and disengaged. They aren’t paying enough time to their schoolwork, family time or day-to-day jobs. It’s like this generation is in a relationship with their phones instead of being in relationship with the people who love them. They are not present in their actual lives.

Dealing with a social media obsessed teen is tricky. Let’s face it, there are no magic solutions to social media. It’s a real battle for every family. Here are my top six strategies which I find critical for parents of teens under the age of 15 to focus on. If you do nothing else when it comes to social media, these are a must!

Never A Gift

If you buy your daughter a mobile phone (or phone plan) as a gift it is really difficult to take that gift back. After all she will argue that a gift is owned by the one who received it! That’s why I suggest that parents own all technology in their home and give their children the privilege of using it if they use it responsibly. If the parent owns technology they are also free to install any safety software they feel necessary.

Crystal Clear Agreements

I think it’s ridiculous to have a written agreement for everything that happens in a home. I’m not personally great at keeping checklists on my kids’ chores on whiteboards or charts. I prefer a bit of random chaos. But when it comes to social media a written contract really is essential. Nothing should be left unsaid.

Buy A Toolbox

Parents have said to me that no matter where they hide their daughter’s phone she always finds it. So, there are times when I’ve suggested it is in everyone’s best interest to buy a toolbox from a hardware store, that has a lock and key. During family times, meal times and homework times the phone goes into the toolbox.

Schedule Time to Check Accounts

In the busyness of life parents often forget to keep connected to what their girls are doing online. They assume all is okay, and sometimes it just isn’t! It’s a good idea to schedule regular times to check teens accounts (and google their name). Installing the right safety software on technology will eliminate the need for you to have their password. Getting teens passwords is a nightmare!

Set a Shut Down Time

The number of girls who sleep with their phones in their bedroom, and even under their pillow, astounds me. Schedule a shut down time and ensure phones are charged in a place where they aren’t accessible. Our daughters need uninterrupted sleep! I would suggest an 8.30pm shut down time to allow them time to unwind before bed.

Talk About the Elephant in the Room

Our daughters do face real challenges online. We know they are there. They know there are there. We just don’t talk about them very much. The more we talk about the elephant in the room the more likely we are to save our daughters from danger. Parents I promise you that your girls are looking for an adult to delve straight into their world ‘boots and all’.

The reality is that nothing will test your relationship with your daughter like social media. Social media gives our teenagers an opportunity to rebel. It ticks all the boxes. It’s an area where teenagers have power over their parents and it is easy for your daughter to exercise that power. That is why no strategy can replace our relationship with our daughters. When it comes to social media, relationship is everything!


Michelle Mitchell is the founder of Youth Excel.

For more great parenting advice, check out Michelle’s new book “Parenting Teenage Girls” (Ark House $24.99), now available at all good book stores.

Visit www.michellemitchell.org

Peninsula Kids – September 2017

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Dive into Immersive Adventure with Nintendo’s Animal Crossing: New Horizons at SEA LIFE Melbourne!
Dive into Immersive Adventure with Nintendo’s Animal Crossing: New Horizons at SEA LIFE Melbourne!
14 Aug 25
Melbourne
Events on August 15, 2025
Dive into Immersive Adventure with Nintendo’s Animal Crossing: New Horizons at SEA LIFE Melbourne!
Dive into Immersive Adventure with Nintendo’s Animal Crossing: New Horizons at SEA LIFE Melbourne!
15 Aug 25
Melbourne
15 Aug
Future Council Q&A with Damon Gameau & Special Guests
15 Aug 25
Rosebud
Future Council Q&A with Damon Gameau & Special Guests
Future Council Q&A with Damon Gameau & Special Guests
15 Aug 25
Rosebud
Events on August 16, 2025
Dive into Immersive Adventure with Nintendo’s Animal Crossing: New Horizons at SEA LIFE Melbourne!
Dive into Immersive Adventure with Nintendo’s Animal Crossing: New Horizons at SEA LIFE Melbourne!
16 Aug 25
Melbourne
Events on August 17, 2025
Dive into Immersive Adventure with Nintendo’s Animal Crossing: New Horizons at SEA LIFE Melbourne!
Dive into Immersive Adventure with Nintendo’s Animal Crossing: New Horizons at SEA LIFE Melbourne!
17 Aug 25
Melbourne
Events on August 19, 2025
Sk8house Sensory Sessions
Sk8house Sensory Sessions
19 Aug 25
Carrum Downs
Events on August 30, 2025
Under The Sea Roller Disco at Sk8house
Under The Sea Roller Disco at Sk8house
30 Aug 25
Carrum Downs
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Established in 2006, Mornington Peninsula News Group (MPNG) is a locally owned and operated, independent media company.

MPNG publishes two glossy magazines: Peninsula Essence and Peninsula Kids.

MPNG also publishes five weekly community newspapers: the Western Port News, Mornington News, Southern Peninsula News, Frankston Times and Chelsea Mordialloc Mentone News.

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🚌🌱 Future Council is the new film from Director Damon Gameau - and it’s screening around Australia from late July. First up - a special tour with live Q&A panels and guest performances. 🎟️ Tickets for the tour are on sale now! 🎬Future Council will then be released in more cinemas from August 7 with a global tour to follow! 🌱
@regenerators @future__council @madmanfilms Madman Films 
#futurecouncil
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🚌🌱 Future Council is the new film from Director Damon Gameau - and it’s screening around Australia from late July. First up - a special tour with live Q&A panels and guest performances. 🎟️ Tickets for the tour are on sale now! 🎬Future Council will then be released in more cinemas from August 7 with a global tour to follow! 🌱 @regenerators @future__council @madmanfilms Madman Films #futurecouncil
4 days ago
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1/9
Tahnee Driver initially dismissed her bloating as a possible food intolerance — maybe gluten. But six weeks ago, everything changed when the 39-year-old mother of two was urged to go to hospital after several days of being unable to keep food down. Then, following an MRI, she received a devastating diagnosis: bowel cancer. 

Read more: https://www.mpnews.com.au/2025/08/06/tahnee-faces-battle-with-stage-4-bowel-cancer
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Tahnee Driver initially dismissed her bloating as a possible food intolerance — maybe gluten. But six weeks ago, everything changed when the 39-year-old mother of two was urged to go to hospital after several days of being unable to keep food down. Then, following an MRI, she received a devastating diagnosis: bowel cancer. Read more: https://www.mpnews.com.au/2025/08/06/tahnee-faces-battle-with-stage-4-bowel-cancer
5 days ago
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2/9
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6 days ago
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3/9
It’s the globally popular video game that’s captured the attention of more than 141 million active players, but Minecraft can also play a significant role in shaping children’s development, social interactions, and cognitive learning.

Read more via the link:

https://peninsulakids.com.au/minecraft-a-gamechanger-for-childrens-learning/

#minecraft #learning #peninsulakidsmagazine #articles #education
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It’s the globally popular video game that’s captured the attention of more than 141 million active players, but Minecraft can also play a significant role in shaping children’s development, social interactions, and cognitive learning. Read more via the link: https://peninsulakids.com.au/minecraft-a-gamechanger-for-childrens-learning/ #minecraft #learning #peninsulakidsmagazine #articles #education
7 days ago
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4/9
Mornington Peninsula Indoor Soccer

Come play futsal at the Civic Centre in Mornington. MPIS strives to provide an environment for kids to feel safe, enjoy the game whatever their level, and make new friends.

Register your team's interest here:
https://www.mpindoorsoccer.com.au/

#mornpen #soccer #indoorsoccer #mornpenindoorsoccer #mpis
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Mornington Peninsula Indoor Soccer Come play futsal at the Civic Centre in Mornington. MPIS strives to provide an environment for kids to feel safe, enjoy the game whatever their level, and make new friends. Register your team's interest here: https://www.mpindoorsoccer.com.au/ #mornpen #soccer #indoorsoccer #mornpenindoorsoccer #mpis
1 week ago
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5/9
Monash University is conducting a study to better understand the challenges and support needs for parents and/or caregivers related to children’s sleep and feeding routines. Your input will help enhance resources and support for families.

To take part in the survey or learn more use the link: https://monash.az1.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/SV_8A4012eElHQ1NQi
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Monash University is conducting a study to better understand the challenges and support needs for parents and/or caregivers related to children’s sleep and feeding routines. Your input will help enhance resources and support for families. To take part in the survey or learn more use the link: https://monash.az1.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/SV_8A4012eElHQ1NQi
1 week ago
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6/9
Join McClelland and the Melbourne Symphony Orchestra for a music workshop on Sat 6 Sept! With guidance from MSO musicians, participants aged 10-14 will develop music skills, experiment with composition, and co-create a brand-new piece to be performed in the MSO in Your Neighbourhood concert in Mornington. 

Learn more. at this link: https://mcclelland.org.au/events/creative-music-workshop

@mcclellandgallery McClelland Sculpture Park+Gallery 
#mso #yourneighbourhoodconcert #mcclelland #creativemusicworkshop
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Join McClelland and the Melbourne Symphony Orchestra for a music workshop on Sat 6 Sept! With guidance from MSO musicians, participants aged 10-14 will develop music skills, experiment with composition, and co-create a brand-new piece to be performed in the MSO in Your Neighbourhood concert in Mornington. Learn more. at this link: https://mcclelland.org.au/events/creative-music-workshop @mcclellandgallery McClelland Sculpture Park+Gallery #mso #yourneighbourhoodconcert #mcclelland #creativemusicworkshop
1 week ago
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7/9
Just announced: 
Dr Seuss' How the Grinch Stole Christmas Live in Concert

This festive season, the Melbourne Symphony Orchestra brings to life the beloved classic How the Grinch Stole Christmas, starring Jim Carrey. 

Watch Cindy Lou Who on the big screen as she takes matters into her own hands and turns both Whoville and the Grinch’s world upside down, inside out and funny side up in her search for the true meaning of Christmas. 

Composed by the late, great composer James Horner, witness the MSO perform the magical score live to screen this December. 

Thursday 4 December at 7.30pm
Friday 5 December at 7.30pm
Saturday 6 December at 1pm
Arts Centre Melbourne, Hamer Hall

Waitlist presale
Thursday 7 August at 10am

General public tickets on sale
Friday 8 August at 10am 

Sign up for presale access: https://bit.ly/41lB5MQ

#howthegrinchstolechristmas @melbournesymphonyorchestra
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Just announced: Dr Seuss' How the Grinch Stole Christmas Live in Concert This festive season, the Melbourne Symphony Orchestra brings to life the beloved classic How the Grinch Stole Christmas, starring Jim Carrey. Watch Cindy Lou Who on the big screen as she takes matters into her own hands and turns both Whoville and the Grinch’s world upside down, inside out and funny side up in her search for the true meaning of Christmas. Composed by the late, great composer James Horner, witness the MSO perform the magical score live to screen this December. Thursday 4 December at 7.30pm Friday 5 December at 7.30pm Saturday 6 December at 1pm Arts Centre Melbourne, Hamer Hall Waitlist presale Thursday 7 August at 10am General public tickets on sale Friday 8 August at 10am Sign up for presale access: https://bit.ly/41lB5MQ #howthegrinchstolechristmas @melbournesymphonyorchestra
1 week ago
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8/9
Melbourne Symphony Orchestra’s Jams for Juniors comes to McClelland. Join Karen Kyriakou and MSO musicians for joyful music-making with little ones aged 0–5. Two fun-filled sessions on 6 Aug & 3 Sept. 
Tickets required for all. Book now.

https://mcclelland.org.au/events/mso-presents-jam-for-juniors-at-mcclelland

@mcclellandgallery McClelland Sculpture Park+Gallery 
#jamsforjuniors #mso
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Melbourne Symphony Orchestra’s Jams for Juniors comes to McClelland. Join Karen Kyriakou and MSO musicians for joyful music-making with little ones aged 0–5. Two fun-filled sessions on 6 Aug & 3 Sept. Tickets required for all. Book now. https://mcclelland.org.au/events/mso-presents-jam-for-juniors-at-mcclelland @mcclellandgallery McClelland Sculpture Park+Gallery #jamsforjuniors #mso
2 weeks ago
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9/9
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