Close Menu
  • Home
  • What’s On
    • Events
    • Add an Event
    • Major Event
    • School Holiday Guide
  • Things To Do
    • Free Activities
      • Coastal Activities
      • Outdoor Activities
      • Picnic Spots
      • Playgrounds
      • Pram Walks
      • Rainy Day Activities
      • Walks and Bike Rides
    • Places to Visit
      • Attractions
      • Day Trips Away From The Peninsula
      • Galleries & Libraries
      • Historical
      • Markets
      • Tourism Centres
    • Places to Eat
      • Cafes
      • Restaurants
      • Wineries
    • Places To Stay
      • Accommodation
    • Shopping
      • Baby Goods – Sale & Hire
      • Child Friendly Shops
      • Made on the Peninsula
      • Online
      • Retail
    • At Home
      • Craft
      • Games
      • Recipes
  • Classes & Groups
    • Creative
      • Art and Craft
    • Playgroups
      • Central and Northern Peninsula
      • Southern Peninsula
      • Western Port
    • Sports
      • Fitness
      • Pre School Sports
      • Sports Classes and Tuition
  • Services
    • Health & Wellbeing
      • Dental
      • Health Care Practitioners
      • Hospitals
      • Support Groups
    • Pregnancy & Baby
      • Prenatal
        • Pre Natal Care/Birth Support
        • Pre Natal Fitness & Wellbeing
        • Maternal Health Centres
        • Maternity Products
      • PostNatal
        • Maternal Health Centres
        • Post Natal Support & Wellbeing
    • Special Needs
      • Activities for Special Needs
      • Support for Special Needs
      • Therapists for Special Needs
    • Education & Childcare
      • Daycare
      • Kindergartens
      • Schools
    • Finance
      • Finance
    • Photography
      • Photography
    • Child Safety & Wellbeing
      • Child Safety/First Aid
      • Emergency Numbers
  • Articles
    • Education
    • Finances
    • Health
    • Parenting Articles
    • Places to Eat
    • Pregnancy & Baby
    • Reviews
    • Member Questions
  • Parties
    • Celebrate – Party Ideas
    • Entertainment
    • Suppliers
    • Venues
  • Giveaways
  • Advertise With Us
  • About Us
    • Contact Us
  • Testimonials
  • Giveaways
Facebook X (Twitter) Instagram
Saturday, July 12
  • Advertise With Us
  • About Us
    • Contact Us
  • Testimonials
  • Giveaways
Facebook X (Twitter) Instagram Pinterest
Peninsula Kids
  • Home
  • What’s On
    • Events
    • Add an Event
    • Major Event
    • School Holiday Guide
  • Things To Do
    • Free Activities
      • Coastal Activities
      • Outdoor Activities
      • Picnic Spots
      • Playgrounds
      • Pram Walks
      • Rainy Day Activities
      • Walks and Bike Rides
    • Places to Visit
      • Attractions
      • Day Trips Away From The Peninsula
      • Galleries & Libraries
      • Historical
      • Markets
      • Tourism Centres
    • Places to Eat
      • Cafes
      • Restaurants
      • Wineries
    • Places To Stay
      • Accommodation
    • Shopping
      • Baby Goods – Sale & Hire
      • Child Friendly Shops
      • Made on the Peninsula
      • Online
      • Retail
    • At Home
      • Craft
      • Games
      • Recipes
  • Classes & Groups
    • Creative
      • Art and Craft
    • Playgroups
      • Central and Northern Peninsula
      • Southern Peninsula
      • Western Port
    • Sports
      • Fitness
      • Pre School Sports
      • Sports Classes and Tuition
  • Services
    • Health & Wellbeing
      • Dental
      • Health Care Practitioners
      • Hospitals
      • Support Groups
    • Pregnancy & Baby
      • Prenatal
        • Pre Natal Care/Birth Support
        • Pre Natal Fitness & Wellbeing
        • Maternal Health Centres
        • Maternity Products
      • PostNatal
        • Maternal Health Centres
        • Post Natal Support & Wellbeing
    • Special Needs
      • Activities for Special Needs
      • Support for Special Needs
      • Therapists for Special Needs
    • Education & Childcare
      • Daycare
      • Kindergartens
      • Schools
    • Finance
      • Finance
    • Photography
      • Photography
    • Child Safety & Wellbeing
      • Child Safety/First Aid
      • Emergency Numbers
  • Articles
    • Education
    • Finances
    • Health
    • Parenting Articles
    • Places to Eat
    • Pregnancy & Baby
    • Reviews
    • Member Questions
  • Parties
    • Celebrate – Party Ideas
    • Entertainment
    • Suppliers
    • Venues
  • Giveaways
Peninsula Kids
Home»Parenting Articles»The many faces of independence
Parenting Articles

The many faces of independence

Updated:January 25, 20234 Mins Read
Facebook Twitter Pinterest LinkedIn Tumblr Email
Share
Facebook Twitter LinkedIn Pinterest Email

5 ways for parents to give their children the skills, encouragemnt and support in their quest for independence.

By Michael Grose

It’s been well documented in recent years that children/young people are now dependent on adults for longer than in the past.  In Australia one in four 18 to 30-year-olds still lives at home and those numbers are on the increase. There are many reasons for this including lack of housing, affordability, working and partnering later, and simple convenience.

The propensity for many parents to do too much for children is a massive contributor to this increased dependency. Oddly, this is the exact opposite of what parents have always done, which is to develop their children’s independence, and in doing so effectively separate from their children.

There are a number of reasons for the current high level of dependency parenting including family shrinkage (parents are able to do a great deal for kids in small families), older parents (often over-concerned), busyness of life (it’s easier to do than delegate) and a heightened fear that the world is a dangerous place for children and young people.

Independence is the point

When independence becomes your priority then suddenly you’ve found a pathway to the development of other positive qualities and traits in your children including the key four – confidence that comes from facing fears; competence that’s built through mastery; creativity that’s encouraged when kids must resolve their own problems; and character that is forged under the duress of challenge and hardship.

Adults are the gatekeepers for children’s independence. And of course, independence takes many guises including:

1. SELF-HELPS SKILLS
The starting point for independence building is giving kids the skills, know-how and confidence to look after their own wellbeing and welfare. This is shown in the many everyday situations where parents model, teach and provide opportunities for children to look after themselves. This includes toddlers undressing themselves, primary aged children preparing their own snacks, and teenagers organising their own transport to school and after school activities. Kids develop real confidence from being able to look after themselves and others.

2. AUTONOMY TO MAKE CHOICES AND MISTAKES
Without realising it, as parents we frequently make choices on our children’s behalf. We choose the food they eat; the games they play; their leisure activities and often the clothes they wear. When families are large (four or more children) parents usually give their children more space to make their own decisions as well as opportunities to learn from their poor choices. This may mean that children choose healthy interests and pursuits that parents are unfamiliar with, or even swim against the tide of their parents’ wishes. In small families parents often know so much about minutiae of children’s lives that inevitably we tend to impose greater well-intentioned control over children’s decisions.

3. FREEDOM TO EXPLORE THE NEIGHBOURHOOD
On a recent trip to Italy I was struck by how much freedom Italian children had to wander their neighbourhoods. It was a throwback to the type of childhood that many of today’s parents experienced, where we had the opportunity to navigate our neighbourhoods on our own without having to check in with our parents all the time.

4. FREEDOM TO EXPLORE UNPREDICTABLE AND POTENTIALLY RISKY ENVIRONMENTS
Independence is also built when children spend time in unpredictable, potentially risky environments such as the bush or new environments beyond their neighbourhood. There may be some risk involved but this is where real learning lies for children and young people. Eliminate the risk and you eliminate the learning.

5. TAKING RESPONSIBILITY FOR YOUR OWN PROBLEMS AND ACTIONS
There’s no doubt many kids are adept at shifting their problems and responsibilities to adults. One of my children would always blame me when they were late for school. Even though the child in question had an alarm clock and was more than capable of using it, any lack of punctuality was somehow shifted to me. Go figure! Independence comes when children take ownership of their responsibilities rather than using someone else as a scapegoat.

In order to grant children and young people the type of independence outlined, parents need to be brave rather than fearful; work hard to develop the skills and know-how kids’ independence requires, and be willing to give kids the encouragement and support they need to step out of their comfort zones when independence seems too hard.


For more expert parenting advice on raising independent kids, join the ‘Parenting Masterclass with Michael Grose’ to develop your parenting blueprint for 2017.  Find out more at www.parentingideas.com.au

As published in Peninsula Kids – Summer 2016/17

Share. Facebook Twitter Pinterest LinkedIn Tumblr Email

Comments are closed.

Calendar
Today
Mon
Tue
Wed
Thu
Fri
Sat
Sun
M
T
W
T
F
S
S
30
1
2
2:00 PM - Soundwaves
3
4
5
6
7
12:00 AM - Winter School Holidays at Sk8house
8
9
10
11
8:30 AM - Rise Outdoors hike - Mount Martha to Mornington
12
13
14
15
4:00 PM - Sk8house Sensory Sessions
16
17
18
19
20
21
22
23
24
25
26
27
28
29
30
31
1
2
3
Soundwaves
Soundwaves
July 2, 2025    
2:00 pm - 3:00 pm
Band and Cinema Complex, HMAS Cerberus
  • Free Activities
  • Other
Join us for our flagship concert series, Soundwaves, at HMAS Cerberus and experience the RAN Band bringing our full wind band and variety of chamber [...]
More Info
Winter School Holidays at Sk8house
07 Jul
July 7, 2025 - July 18, 2025    
12:00 am
Sk8house
  • Family Activity
Winter School Holidays at Sk8house!   Get ready for non-stop fun this winter school holidays at Sk8house! We're pulling out all the stops to make [...]
More Info
Rise Outdoors hike - Mount Martha to Mornington
11 Jul
July 11, 2025    
8:30 am - 5:00 pm
Book now
  • School Holidays
Join our team of expert Outdoor Educators on a full-day hike from Mount Martha to Mornington on 11 July, to disconnect from screens, explore the [...]
More Info
Sk8house Sensory Sessions
Sk8house Sensory Sessions
July 15, 2025    
4:00 pm - 7:00 pm
Sk8house
  • Workshop/Class
The Sk8house Sensory Sessions aim to be a calm, welcoming space for skaters of all abilities to roll their way — with reduced noise, gentle [...]
More Info
Events on July 2, 2025
Soundwaves
Soundwaves
2 Jul 25
HMAS Cerberus
Events on July 7, 2025
07 Jul
Winter School Holidays at Sk8house
7 Jul 25
Carrum Downs
Events on July 11, 2025
11 Jul
Rise Outdoors hike - Mount Martha to Mornington
11 Jul 25
Events on July 15, 2025
Sk8house Sensory Sessions
Sk8house Sensory Sessions
15 Jul 25
Carrum Downs
Visit Our Advertisers
ABOUT

Established in 2006, Mornington Peninsula News Group (MPNG) is a locally owned and operated, independent media company.

MPNG publishes two glossy magazines: Peninsula Essence and Peninsula Kids.

MPNG also publishes five weekly community newspapers: the Western Port News, Mornington News, Southern Peninsula News, Frankston Times and Chelsea Mordialloc Mentone News.

ADVERTISE WITH US

Instagram
Wait…it’s not a pic of a lake??? 
What do you see???
mornpenkids
mornpenkids
•
Follow
Wait…it’s not a pic of a lake??? What do you see???
3 days ago
View on Instagram |
1/9
If this is your first experience of winter with a baby you might be wondering what you need to do to protect them from the elements. Babywearing is a wonderful start as you each warm the other. You can top that up with hats, mittens and booties but go easy with coats and suits. Rather than thick single garments, add an extra layer or two. Avoid bulky hoods which can restrict free head movement. Keep in mind, as you rug them up, that your body is a wonderful heat bank for your child. Light layers plus protection for the head, hands and feet is the way to go. You can pop “baby legs” leg warmers on to keep exposed legs warmer.

Read more here: https://peninsulakids.com.au/baby-its-cold-outside/
Or via link to mag in bio.

#babyitscoldoutside @peninsulakidsmagazine #lovepeninsulakids
mornpenkids
mornpenkids
•
Follow
If this is your first experience of winter with a baby you might be wondering what you need to do to protect them from the elements. Babywearing is a wonderful start as you each warm the other. You can top that up with hats, mittens and booties but go easy with coats and suits. Rather than thick single garments, add an extra layer or two. Avoid bulky hoods which can restrict free head movement. Keep in mind, as you rug them up, that your body is a wonderful heat bank for your child. Light layers plus protection for the head, hands and feet is the way to go. You can pop “baby legs” leg warmers on to keep exposed legs warmer. Read more here: https://peninsulakids.com.au/baby-its-cold-outside/ Or via link to mag in bio. #babyitscoldoutside @peninsulakidsmagazine #lovepeninsulakids
5 days ago
View on Instagram |
2/9
👀😮 Ooooh..this looks gooooood. Has anyone read the book?

Betrayal and revenge come knocking on The Family Next Door this August!

The ABC, Screen Australia and VicScreen are pleased to announce the thrilling six-part suburban mystery drama series The Family Next Door will premiere on Sunday 10 August at 8pm on ABC TV, with all episodes available to stream on ABC iview.

It’s peak holiday season in the popular seaside town of Osprey Point when an enigmatic stranger, Isabelle (Palmer) rents a family home in a quiet cul-de-sac. As Isabelle charms her way into her neighbours’ homes and lives, she quickly discovers that everyone at Pleasant Court has something to hide. How far will her obsessive drive to solve a mystery push her to expose the truth?

Based on New York Times bestselling Australian author Sally Hepworth’s novel of the same name, this sophisticated and entertaining mystery blends drama and humour while exploring family dynamics through the unique lens of award-winning screenwriter Sarah Scheller (Strife, The Letdown) and Emma Freeman’s (The Newsreader, Interview with the Vampire) character-driven directorial skills.

#abciview #sallyhepworth #thefamilynextdoor
mornpenkids
mornpenkids
•
Follow
👀😮 Ooooh..this looks gooooood. Has anyone read the book? Betrayal and revenge come knocking on The Family Next Door this August! The ABC, Screen Australia and VicScreen are pleased to announce the thrilling six-part suburban mystery drama series The Family Next Door will premiere on Sunday 10 August at 8pm on ABC TV, with all episodes available to stream on ABC iview. It’s peak holiday season in the popular seaside town of Osprey Point when an enigmatic stranger, Isabelle (Palmer) rents a family home in a quiet cul-de-sac. As Isabelle charms her way into her neighbours’ homes and lives, she quickly discovers that everyone at Pleasant Court has something to hide. How far will her obsessive drive to solve a mystery push her to expose the truth? Based on New York Times bestselling Australian author Sally Hepworth’s novel of the same name, this sophisticated and entertaining mystery blends drama and humour while exploring family dynamics through the unique lens of award-winning screenwriter Sarah Scheller (Strife, The Letdown) and Emma Freeman’s (The Newsreader, Interview with the Vampire) character-driven directorial skills. #abciview #sallyhepworth #thefamilynextdoor
5 days ago
View on Instagram |
3/9
Bring the kids to experience live theatre at Frankston Arts Centre in August!

An instant Australian classic, Beetle by Legs On The Wall tells the story of a child who finds a friend in her backyard; together they embark on an adventure to search for his family, the now elusive Christmas Beetle.

The magic of the bush habitat is brought to life through Legs On The Wall’s trademark physical storytelling, and animation created from original artworks by beloved children’s author and illustrator Freya Blackwood.

A tale of resilience and hope, Beetle reminds young audiences that there’s an important place in the world for all of us. Reminding us of the delicate balance of the natural world and that all things are connected.

This charming, nostalgic and uniquely Australian show invites children and families to join the adventure, encountering larger than life beetles, stick insects, and other bush critters while finding out about the uncanny nature and delicate balance of the bush environment. See it on Friday 22 August at 11am or 6pm at Frankston Arts Centre. Tickets are available at thefac.com.au or by calling 03 9784 1060.

#whatson #fac #kidstheatre #frankstonartscentre #beetlebylegsonthewall
@the_fac
mornpenkids
mornpenkids
•
Follow
Bring the kids to experience live theatre at Frankston Arts Centre in August! An instant Australian classic, Beetle by Legs On The Wall tells the story of a child who finds a friend in her backyard; together they embark on an adventure to search for his family, the now elusive Christmas Beetle. The magic of the bush habitat is brought to life through Legs On The Wall’s trademark physical storytelling, and animation created from original artworks by beloved children’s author and illustrator Freya Blackwood. A tale of resilience and hope, Beetle reminds young audiences that there’s an important place in the world for all of us. Reminding us of the delicate balance of the natural world and that all things are connected. This charming, nostalgic and uniquely Australian show invites children and families to join the adventure, encountering larger than life beetles, stick insects, and other bush critters while finding out about the uncanny nature and delicate balance of the bush environment. See it on Friday 22 August at 11am or 6pm at Frankston Arts Centre. Tickets are available at thefac.com.au or by calling 03 9784 1060. #whatson #fac #kidstheatre #frankstonartscentre #beetlebylegsonthewall @the_fac
7 days ago
View on Instagram |
4/9
Pretty much!
mornpenkids
mornpenkids
•
Follow
Pretty much!
1 week ago
View on Instagram |
5/9
Epson launches four new EcoTank printers as sales top 100 million and the company remains number one in large ink tank printer sales.

EcoTank inkjet printers are world leaders in providing improved productivity for homes and small businesses for a number of reasons.

Firstly, they come with up to two years’ worth of ink in the box, so you don’t need to worry about suddenly running out or constantly ordering replacements. This also means less user intervention due to fewer replaceable parts, giving you back time to invest in yourself and your business.

There is zero warm-up time and a very fast first page out time with EcoTank printers and this, combined with their unique Heat-Free Technology, saves you time, energy, money and allows you greater flexibility for your home or small business.

The new Epson EcoTank ET-4950, ET-3950, ET-3900 and ET-2950 printers come with a 24 month EcoTank Back to Base Warranty (12 month standard express warranty and an bonus additional 12 months upon registration) and are available now from https://www.epson.com.au/ecotank/, and all authorised Epson stockists.

#epsonecotank #ad @epsonaust @Epson
mornpenkids
mornpenkids
•
Follow
Epson launches four new EcoTank printers as sales top 100 million and the company remains number one in large ink tank printer sales. EcoTank inkjet printers are world leaders in providing improved productivity for homes and small businesses for a number of reasons. Firstly, they come with up to two years’ worth of ink in the box, so you don’t need to worry about suddenly running out or constantly ordering replacements. This also means less user intervention due to fewer replaceable parts, giving you back time to invest in yourself and your business. There is zero warm-up time and a very fast first page out time with EcoTank printers and this, combined with their unique Heat-Free Technology, saves you time, energy, money and allows you greater flexibility for your home or small business. The new Epson EcoTank ET-4950, ET-3950, ET-3900 and ET-2950 printers come with a 24 month EcoTank Back to Base Warranty (12 month standard express warranty and an bonus additional 12 months upon registration) and are available now from https://www.epson.com.au/ecotank/, and all authorised Epson stockists. #epsonecotank #ad @epsonaust @Epson
2 weeks ago
View on Instagram |
6/9
2026 kinder registrations are now open!
If your child turns three or four by 30 April next year, they are eligible to attend kinder!

Register before 2 July 2025: www.mornpen.vic.gov.au/kindergarten

#kinder #kinderregistration2026
mornpenkids
mornpenkids
•
Follow
2026 kinder registrations are now open! If your child turns three or four by 30 April next year, they are eligible to attend kinder! Register before 2 July 2025: www.mornpen.vic.gov.au/kindergarten #kinder #kinderregistration2026
3 weeks ago
View on Instagram |
7/9
Elmo’s Circus Dream, a dazzling new live stage spectacular making its world premiere at Caulfield Racecourse these upcoming July School Holidays from June 27th to August 3rd, 2025.

Tickets and information: https://www.sesamestreetcircus.com.au/

#sesamestreetcircus 

@sesamestreetcircus 
@cavanaghpr
mornpenkids
mornpenkids
•
Follow
Elmo’s Circus Dream, a dazzling new live stage spectacular making its world premiere at Caulfield Racecourse these upcoming July School Holidays from June 27th to August 3rd, 2025. Tickets and information: https://www.sesamestreetcircus.com.au/ #sesamestreetcircus @sesamestreetcircus @cavanaghpr
1 month ago
View on Instagram |
8/9
❄️ Winter is here! And along with it, a fresh edition on Peninsula Kids magazine. Enjoy flipping through the pages that celebrate the season’s highlights so that you can make the most of the frostier months with your loved ones. 🥰
🌬️ Link to read in bio
————————————————————————————
#peninsulakids #peninsulakidsmagazine #winter #lovepeninsulakids #mpgrown #local #pregnnacyandbaby #creative #education #health #spotlight #recipes
mornpenkids
mornpenkids
•
Follow
❄️ Winter is here! And along with it, a fresh edition on Peninsula Kids magazine. Enjoy flipping through the pages that celebrate the season’s highlights so that you can make the most of the frostier months with your loved ones. 🥰 🌬️ Link to read in bio ———————————————————————————— #peninsulakids #peninsulakidsmagazine #winter #lovepeninsulakids #mpgrown #local #pregnnacyandbaby #creative #education #health #spotlight #recipes
1 month ago
View on Instagram |
9/9
View on Instagram
Subscribe to our Newsletter

Stay In The Know

Sign up to our free newsletter and receive weekly updates on events and things to do with kids on the Mornington Peninsula.

Facebook X (Twitter) Instagram Pinterest
© 2025 All Rights Reserved.

Type above and press Enter to search. Press Esc to cancel.