Understanding School Refusal or ‘School Can’t’
By Sarah Fortnam-Gray
For some families, the school morning routine has become a daily battle. A child who once happily walked through the school gates may suddenly experience tears, headaches, stomach aches, panic, shutdown or an overwhelming feeling that they simply cannot attend.
This experience, often referred to as school refusal, is becoming an increasingly recognised issue across Australia and around the world. It is not simply a case of a child being difficult, lazy or choosing not to go to school. Increasingly, experts are recognising that school attendance difficulties are often a sign that something deeper is happening for a young person.
School Can’t Australia describes “school can’t” as a child’s inability to attend or participate in education, often alongside distress, disengagement or both. Experiences exist across a wide spectrum – from students who struggle with morning resistance but still attend, through to young people experiencing such significant distress that leaving their bedroom or completing everyday tasks becomes extremely challenging.
The scale of the issue is significant. Recent reporting in The Age highlighted that more than 26,000 Victorian Year 8 students are currently disengaged from school, with research estimating that the long-term economic impact could reach $33 billion over their working lives. The figures include students who are absent, students who attend but are disengaged and those whose potential is not being fully supported.
But behind every statistic is a child, a family and a story.
Professionals working in this area are seeing increasing numbers of young people struggling with anxiety-based school avoidance. The School Refusal Clinic in St Kilda, led by mental health social worker John Chellew, specialises in supporting young people experiencing anxiety-related difficulties with school attendance.
The important shift is understanding that school refusal is often not about a child “refusing” at all. A more helpful question is: What is making school feel impossible right now?
A young person who refuses to get dressed, complains of physical symptoms, becomes distressed on Sunday nights or shuts down at the school gate may not be trying to avoid responsibility; they may be communicating that something feels overwhelming, unsafe or beyond their current capacity.
School Can’t Australia highlights the importance of moving away from blame and instead becoming curious about a student’s experience. The language we use matters. When adults focus only on behaviour, the underlying barriers can be missed. When adults look beneath the behaviour, they are more likely to understand what support is needed.
Early support can make a significant difference. This may involve adjustments within the school environment, wellbeing support, changes to expectations, alternative pathways, therapeutic support or simply creating a plan that allows a young person to rebuild confidence through manageable steps.
For some students, the right adjustments and support within mainstream schooling will be enough. For others, a different learning environment may provide the opportunity to reconnect with education. Special Assistance Schools, including local options such as Foundation Learning Centre, Indie College and David Scott School all in Frankston and Advance College in Hastings, provide flexible education pathways for students who have struggled to engage in traditional settings.
Most importantly, families do not have to navigate this alone.
Support is available through:
- Your child’s school wellbeing or engagement team
- School Can’t Australia
- Gray Matters – School Engagement Support, a local Peninsula-based service supporting students and families experiencing school attendance difficulties
- Can’t Face School, supporting families in Melbourne’s northern suburbs and online
- The School Refusal Clinic in St Kilda
School refusal is a serious and growing issue, but there is also hope. With understanding, compassion and the right support, many young people can reconnect with learning, rebuild confidence and rediscover their sense of belonging at school.
The first step is recognising that behind every missed day is a young person who needs to be understood – not blamed.
Sarah is a teacher with more than 20 years’ experience supporting young people experiencing school refusal, anxiety, neurodiversity and school disengagement. www.gray-matters.com.au